Writing this article was heavy for me as I decided to reveal
a part of myself. I’ve never shied away from discussing sexual education,
sexuality, and sexual behavior in social settings. Partly because certain
incidents triggered me, and partly because it never felt unnatural to me,
perhaps due to my upbringing and the people around me. I’ve written about these
topics on digital platforms before as well. However, my bold approach to
discussing sexuality and sexual education put me in a vulnerable situation,
both online and in my personal and professional circles.
Many were surprised that a woman could speak so openly about
such sensitive issues, and they applauded me. However, I also received negative
attention, hate, shame, and inappropriate advances from men. It was terrifying
as I felt unequipped to deal with it, which led me to start practicing MMA.
Additionally, it disturbed me so much that I deleted my online presence and
shifted my focus elsewhere. I started learning cloud computing, got into DevOps because
channeling my energy into something positive felt like the right thing to do.
While away from digital spaces, I educated myself about
human psychology, particularly focusing on cluster B personalities. This made
me exceptional at handling toxic people. I also educated myself about the male
gaze, toxic masculinity, and the thought processes of patriarchal and
misogynistic men—not because I hated men, but to be better equipped to handle
those who exhibit such toxic traits. It was one hell of a journey! After all
this, I can say one thing with certainty: "Knowledge conquers fear."
Returning to digital spaces after a long break, I found the
online world completely changed. Digital spaces are now rattled with hatred and
negativity. I don't recognize this world at all, even though I am connected
with the same people on social media platforms. The same people who used to
post about traveling, fitness, books, and personal growth are now discussing
completely different topics. It feels like they’ve developed strong ideologies
and a sense of identity that didn’t exist before.
These people are unrecognizable to me. It seems like
everyone has lost complete emotional control. They’re on edge all the time,
ready to attack one another over the smallest criticism of their ideology.
Unwilling to understand another person’s perspective, they’re unable to
differentiate between fake and real news. The heightened negative emotions are
deeply concerning. I question myself: how did the people I used to call friends
become so unrecognizable? What caused them to change so much? How did all this
happen?
When the RG Kar Medical College and Hospital, Kolkata rape
case hit the internet, it deeply impacted me as it did many others. The
incident stirred up conversations across digital spaces, forums, and media
houses. Rimjhim Sinha, a young girl, initiated the “Reclaim the Night”
movement, which has turned into a widespread protest still ongoing across the
country, even after two weeks. I followed the RG Kar rape news vigorously, like
many others—from BJP leaders asking for Mamata Banerjee’s resignation to bizarre
allegations against the Principal Prof. Sandip Ghosh, domestic violence cases
against Sanjoy Roy, and unrest among protesting doctors.
Just when I thought I was recovering, another horrifying
news story broke from Badlapur: a 3-year-old and a 4-year-old girl were raped
on school premises. It’s so heinous and shameful! After that, it felt like a
series of rape cases flooded the internet. Media houses know that violence and
rape are trending topics online, so they’ve jumped in, showcasing overwhelming
emotions and half-truths, merely creating sensationalism to capture public
attention and increase TRP. Rape cases were happening before Kolkata incident
too but they all went unnoticed, media didn’t report simply because the keyword
was not trending before.
It’s unsettling when anyone sensationalizes brutal rape and
murder with misinformation and half-truths. The news is already sensational;
there’s no need to exaggerate it further with half-truths. In fact, getting the
facts right would be a relief. It’s okay if the news hits the internet a little
late, but with proper research. Where is our sensitivity, humility, empathy,
and sympathy for the victims?
As John Abraham rightly said in an interview, India is not
safe for women, children, or even animals. I totally felt that. I love my
country, but I will not shy away from criticizing the wrongs happening within
it. I have no shame in accepting that we Indians have completely failed as a
society!
In India, we cannot expect women to be safe when convicted
serial rapists and murderers like Ram Rahim and Asaram Bapu are released on
parole, especially during elections. Shouldn’t we fear that they might repeat
their behavior? This situation highlights the failure of our entire social
fabric, judiciary system, and political leadership. People like them are not
afraid because they’ve figured out that no one can harm them. Forget about laws
in cases involving powerful men; they know how to bend, manipulate, and use
laws to their advantage.
I was reminded of one show constantly while writing this
article—Aamir Khan’s “Satyamev Jayate.” It aired in 2012, not so long ago. This
show tackled sensitive topics like female feticide, child abuse, sexual
education, domestic violence, untouchability, discrimination, toxic
masculinity, alcoholism, and much more. It was an unfiltered representation of
our society. I must say, Mr. Perfectionist did an amazing job handling these
sensitive topics with great skill. The show wasn’t only about problems; it also
focused on finding solutions through constructive criticism and discussions.
Fast forward to 2024, and India has become a nation that is extremely proud and extremely sensitive. Although the pride we once took in our unity in diversity is now questionable, there is still so much to love—our rich culture, diverse cuisine, warm hospitality, and more. However, the moment someone criticizes our flaws as a nation, we get extremely offended. If someone points out the income and wealth inequalities in our nation or the lack of civic sense among our population, or the unsafe environment for women, instead of introspecting and understanding that such criticism comes from observing reality, we retaliate. We call them out, label them anti-national, and dismiss the criticism as unwarranted. We are learning nothing from other countries and history.
If a foreign media house highlights the sorry state of Indian sports on a global scale—pointing out that a population of 1.4 billion
people could not secure a gold medal at the Olympics—we respond by highlighting
our achievements in multinational companies, boasting about Indian CEOs who
gave up Indian citizenship. Rather than improving in the areas being
criticized, we double down by presenting something else we excel at. This is a
lack of introspection and textbook mass manipulation at work! 2012 to 2024—what
changed?
When Prime Minister Modi and many others say that only
strict laws can change this situation, they are mistaken. Rape in India is a
complex, multilayered issue. After all, we changed and brought in strict laws
recommended by the Justice Verma Committee Report after the Nirbhaya rape case,
yet the brutality of rape and sexual violence continues. Taliban have strict
laws crime against women but are the women happy there? Nothing will change
until we address the core issues of our society. Education is under crisis, and sexual education is a big problem, but there are other factors too. I’ll save
those for my next post, as delving into them here would make this article much
longer than intended.
Until then, I hope you can regain your emotional control.
Take care of your mental health, folks! Don’t participate in communal crisis, fake news, disinformation and political
agendas. Most importantly don’t lose the people you used to call friends. It’s Sunday—try to
unplug from the matrix.
0 Comments